Rush at Customs

"I've been racking my brain... I'm trying to figure out how Bob Dole's luggage got on my airplane. I told the doctor, 'Look, I'm worried about the next election.'" "The people at Customs were as nice as they could be; they just didn't believe me when I told them that I got those pills from the Clinton Library gift shop. They told me at the Clinton Library gift shop that they were just little blue M&Ms." "I know a lot of people in Washington don't even need Viagra; they just look at themselves in the mirror and the problem is solved."

— Rush Limbaugh in response to reports that he was detained for possession of a bottle of Viagra that had the names of two Florida doctors, but not his.