CARL BERNSTEIN'S DILEMMA: He used to be famous. Three decades ago, for about two years. He and his journalist partner Bob Woodward made history with their unprecedented coverage of the Watergate scandal in the Washington Post. Together they wrote an excellent book, All the President's Men. The years, alas, haven't been very good to Bernstein. He later co-authored an unremarkable book about Pope John Paul, then wrote a memoir about his parents. (Mom was a big advocate for the notorious American traitor Ethel Rosenberg.) Bernstein's no traitor, he just misses the limelight. So as Bush's poll numbers drop, Bernstein can't help thinking about the good old days when he helped unseat a president. Golly gee whiz, Carl'd love to give it a second shot. You see, he wants George W. Bush investigated — with an eye to, you know, removing him from office. Won't you join me in a gaping yawn.