RELEVANT, BIG TIME: Enough about Supreme Court nominees — let's turn to issues of huge social and cultural import. Sarah Jessica Parker, actor, reveals she's given quite a bit of thought to her new line of ... perfume.

Q: What is it about your perfume that you like? A: Our goal was for it to be a fragrance that has social skills. It doesn't dominate a room. It does not cling to you when someone hugs you ... a fragrance you want to be downwind of -- not an interloper. It's feminine, not super-floral, with a little musk, and a little sexy, but not "of-the-moment." It's a timeless thing.

Perhaps those sentences will begin to make sense if I read them until my mind secures the numbness required not to care about mere meaning. I'm pleased to report I now vaguely understand what's being intimated when I overhear conversations about a coffee bean with "nuance." I didn't use to get it. It took some time to figure out why anything more than "hot" or "freshly brewed" mattered, but today I nod with the best of 'em when reference is made to "rare herbal undertones" and "spiciness" and "buttery." Yes, it's true. My Starbucks espresso maker (er, barista) told me yesterday about a new "buttery" coffee blend. I used to end up with buttery coffee back in my toast-dipping days, but now it's scones or nothing at all. Dip a scone? How uncouth, how nontimeless. Did I mention my favorite kind of scones don't cling, yet convey a bit of musk without daring to be too dominating? I deplore bossy baked goods...